It's late, I have a headache, and I just wrote a horrible essay that's due tomorrow. I am going to complain a little because I realized I only write happy blogs where everything is sunshine and smiley faces :) but that's not how my life always is...sometimes it's "I just stepped in a huge mud puddle, spilled coffee on my white shirt, 10 minutes late to class and missed a quiz" kind of life. I do love the sunshine but I've got to be real, it's not always so sunny around here.
I can't always hold myself up like everything is perfect because that's not the truth. I feel like I have to be stable and put on my happy face to be able to be there for anyone when they need it. But I really need people to be there for me sometimes. I know a lot of it is my fault because I don't tell people when I struggle because then I feel like I am being selfish by needing too much from someone else. I just cry out to God. But I know God wants me to be real with people. So here it is...realness. I'm overwhelmed and lonely. I need people and I need rest. Loneliness is not from the Lord...because He never leaves us. I need to fully take hold of this. I also need to trust that He will provide me with relationship with people. I also need to rest in Him.
LORD teach me to rest in you and trust in your provision for my life.
1 comment:
Elisa I feel bad for pretty much turning you down 3 times in the last 4 days. first on Friday, then on Sunday. now this last night. I hope time with Furze was good even if he is kind of just using you for laundry. Let's definitely sit with each other this Sunday.
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